Friday, January 30, 2009

As Seen on TV....

I have always been a very big fan of the ‘As Seen on TV’ products. And it has been difficult at times, but I have always managed enough restraint to (almost) never buy any of those products, no matter how cool or amazing they seemed. In fact, at Walgreen’s they have a section of one of the back aisles where they sell all different kinds of those items and I just force myself to stay away from the source of temptation because I know if it’s right in front of me, I WILL CAVE. But I think they’ve been watching and they’ve figured out my plan. The other morning, I stopped at Walgreen’s on my way to work and I’m not kidding, it was like they knew I was coming. As soon as I walked in, right there almost so close to the entrance that you would have to knock it out of the way in order to get in to the store was a display – and on that display just happened to be the latest ‘As Seen on TV’ arrivals. How convenient. All of a sudden, I started breaking out in a cold sweat…my throat started to close up….my pulse was RACING. I looked around to see if anyone was watching. Nope. I knew that this was the moment – I could no longer just run from the demon. I had to look it in the eyes and confront it. I had to show force. I had to laugh in the face….So that’s just what I did.

And I only spent $20 (plus tax, of course)!

Look – you judge me, but deep down, I know you are jealous that I actually did it and you’re itching to find out what I purchased. Did it work? Was it as cool as it seemed on the advertisement? You’re curious….just like I was. And I’m here to tell you that it’s ok to be curious. So, here’s what you’ve been waiting for – the low down on the goods. Ladies, if you’ve seen the commercials, these are absolutely THE two items you are most curious about of the entire line of ‘As Seen on TV’ products. That’s right – The bra strap clip and the body hair grinder.

First, the bra strap clip: Its official name is “Strap Perfect” and while it sells on television for $20, it’s only $10 in the store. And here’s what’s cool, you get SIX of these clips – 2 black, 2 clear, and 2 nude. Here’s the thing: I am so frustrated with my bra straps not staying up. I’ve tried the subtle tactics like rotating my shoulder in hopes of scooting it back in place, or with ever so much grace pinching the shoulder of my blouse, making sure to catch the wandering strap in my pinch, and then ever so gently pushing it back to the starting line…it doesn’t work. And I’d be lying if I said that it ever really did. I was done trying to be a lady about it. I no longer concerned myself with maintaining my dignity (well, what dignity I had to start with). It no longer phased me to address the situation, even if I was in a room full of men. You know the drill I’m talking about – Grabbing hold of your neckline like a handle, pulling it out away from you (which becomes tougher in these cold months when you’re wearing a turtleneck sweater), sending your arm in to go fishing for your strap which is hanging out around your elbow by the time you’ve lost your patience, and dragging it back up into position, knowing that no sooner does your neckline recover from the fishing expedition you will be going back in. I was weak and I’m not ashamed to say it.

Well, I was so excited about these clips that I took them to work with me and put one on as soon as I got in the building. And ladies, I emerged a new woman. I had better posture and, lo and behold, somewhere between when I went in and when I came out, my girls had learned how to walk! Not only are your straps good to go all day and all night, but you finally get some REAL support. And yes, you really can put them on all by yourself – I will say that connecting them takes a little getting used to and at first, you might find yourself with your straps pulled all the way up over your head as you attempt to do a few acrobatic tricks to get it hooked around the various straps. But I do not lie when I tell you this is the greatest item I have ever purchased. That day, I was so giddy about how great they worked that I told all of my lady co-workers about them and ended up giving my other five away just so they could taste a slice of that elation pie I was now eating from. This, my friends, is the good life.

While not near as exciting as the strap perfect, the other thing I bought (again, only $10) was the “Smooth Away” – it’s this pink thing that you stick a piece of what I will refer to as body hair sand paper and just start gently sanding that body hair right off! Well, it works! The sandpaper is very smooth, almost more like a piece of rubber or plastic. And not only does it remove the hair, it also exfoliates. In fact, you have to dust yourself off every so often while using this because of all of the skin dust. It’s really the craziest thing I’ve ever seen – unfortunately, what I’m really looking for is something I can wipe all over my legs and pits and after one miracle application, the hair is gone forever. *sigh* I guess I’ll just have to keep watching the commercials.

So there you have it – I took one for the team and I was victorious! Run, ladies! Run to your nearest drug store or As Seen on TV outlet and purchase! You will totally thank me. In fact, You’re Welcome…in advance.

Have a great weekend –

Princess Rhonda

(Royalty of Retail)

2 comments:

Unknown said...

What - no Ped Egg???? I got that one and it works but frankly I would rather pay for a pedicure than use it.

Kim said...

FUNNY STUFF!

Mom got one of those hair sanders for Shel for her birthday. I think I need one for Florida since the kids never give me enough time in the shower to shave an entire leg.